Steal away

I'll write on paper words to say
That now I sadly steal away
to wilderness for death or strife
away from those who hurt me in my life.

A peaceful glade I hope I find
where clouds disperse my troubled mind
'neath starry sky to make my bed
so Milky swab will sooth my poor bewildered head.

There and then not now I'll feel
whilst gazing up at Heaven's wheel
pondering it's huge installment
alone, yet blissfull, taking for my pleasure nature's moment

For rest be there, and peace,
No more to cry, no more to sigh
no more to puzzle over reasons why,
No harsh reaction changing joyful mood of mine to shy.

No more to laugh,
No more to love,
If not, no more to live;
that place to go would be to go to die.

On thinking then, what be the choice?
now occupied, the mind ignores a nagging inner voice,
and sadnesses, though they are still there,
and what it is- to be aware.

Though physically removed from others
concience will remain where'er I am,
proximity not affecting that of which I care,
but with no one else to share, do I dare?

Be I here or be I there
It seems to me it would matter not if I alighted anywhere.
While shining points in blackened sky be pretty still,
In viewing their escape could I avoid a cold, hard and lonely stare?

Should I expect of them their company,
that I be seen by them the same,
so they to me could send their love
that I would read their solemn prayer?